Single Guy Constitution:
From SGZ #6

1) The name of the society is the Loyal Order of Single Guys
2) The objects/aims of the Society are:
     a) to promote guilt and shame towards our ex-girlfriends.
     b) to learn how to trace license plates of potential dates.
     c) to get on with our lives and not sit at home on Friday nights and read the phone book or watch the Parliamentary Channel.

The Oath:
To qualify as a single guy, you must pledge the following: "I need the company of other males so I may eventually realize that relationships with women are supposed to drive me crazy."

Membership:
General membership shall be defined as "any male currently single for a minimum of thirty (30) days." Special membership shall be granted to "nice guys" on the basis of a formal application to the Board of Governors. Nice guys are allowed a reasonable number of depraved thoughts per week, but should prove their mettle by not choosing to discuss these sentiments loudly in a locker room. Nice guys will be allowed to complain twice as loud and twice as long as general members, and receive an extra hug each month.

Discrimination:
The Loyal Order of Single Guys will not discriminate against any person(s) on any of the following grounds except: Gender or martial status.